It's said that Jesus is the Cornerstone of every Christian church. I believe that. The Cornerstone is what keeps our faith just. Remove that cornerstone, faith disintegrates. We become lost. Nothing holds the church up anymore. Ergo, the reason the Christian church has stood for over 2000 years is the people's faith in Christ, our Cornerstone.
Let me apply that to everyday life.
I am from a family of 8. Five boys, three girls, one mother and one father. One half of the cornerstone of this family was my father. I say "was", because my earthly father has passed this life. When he was with us, we were one Big Happy Family. It was difficult losing him, we were all there, we saw, and it hurt. Me, being a woman of faith, I know where my dad is. I'm sure my siblings are aware of that too, and that's their own personal journey or belief. There's also my mother, which is the other half of that cornerstone: the foundation has been shaken.
Before this "earthquake", if you will, this family pretty much stayed together. We talked, we got together, etc. Nothing to write home about, but we are family. One thing I've noticed, since the "cornerstone" has been rocked, the rest of the building is unstable.
My mother, the other half, is in despair, and has every right to be: she lost ~literaly~, the other half of her cornerstone. That's a whole other issue. But the rest of the building, my siblings, have crumbled. No one wants to talk about it. No one wants to discuss the "elephant in the room". I do. So therefore, I'm out. It's just me. And my faith.
I want to rebuild. Jesus is still my Cornerstone. My dad, God bless his soul, knew this. My dad wouldn't want this family to crubmle, or deny, or excuse, or any other reason someone could come up with to deny the reality that my dad is with my Father in Heaven.
Everyone grieves. I grieve to this day. But I accept. And I have faith. Although I have the utmost faith in my Father in Heaven, which gives me comfort, my grief is also filled with loneliness, My father left a void in this family the size of the Grand Canyon. I'm in the middle of this canyon, alone. I'm waiting for my siblings to realize the cornerstone has been rocked, but it can be rebuilt on faith, love, and acceptance.
Jesus was the cornerstone to His church, and look how much was learned, respected, and loved. My dad was part of our family cornerstone; he did pretty much the same thing. I know where my dad is, I just want to know where the rest of my family is.
The cornerstone to my family still stands. It will stand as long as it's underlayer will stay together, come together, and merge. If the remaining cornerstone crumbles, and all the underlayers can't uphold it, the entire foundation collapses. I know I'll still be here, even if I'm alone: Because I still hold to the one Foundation that is my faith. It can be lonely, or it can be shared. I invite anyone who wants to share.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
That's it.
2 comments:
Christine,
Whoa, something told me to check your blog tonight. I think it was your Dad whispering to me.....
We also experienced something similar, when our "Nana" passed away last January. She was the last remaining "cornerstone" in our family. As you know, "Pop-Pop" passed away July 4th, 2001. Nana survived that, living another 6 1/2 years. They were married some 60+ years!
Things in our family drastically changed as well. The family dynamic just wasn't the same after losing two such strong people in our family. It seems that after Nana passed away, (the last of her generation ) people in our family drifted apart. Holidays that we ALWAYS spent together, because Nana would be there, started to become holidays that some family members spent with their "other" families. No more were the typical group of Ulrichs/Griffins/Wolperts seen all together at one time. Kids didn't come home for all major holidays from out of state like they used to. This applies to several generations. Some family moved out of Jersey, some stayed. The remaining few grew apart, slowly but surely. No longer was the mandatory "week of celebration" from Christmas to New Years. Summers are no longer spent heading down the shore to the Wolpert Country Club. 5A has started to gather dust, from lack of use.
As less and less settings of china needed to be set for the holidays, I found myself wondering, where did everybody go? It is almost acceptable to not get together for holidays, or BBQ's, or just hanging out. Everyone has chosen their path in life, and it seems like family is no longer the top priority.
We do have several family members that have encountered medical problems, not allowing them to travel as they once did. The rest of the healthy ones have taken to visiting friends, or vacations to exotic destinations, instead of making the trek back to Jersey.
Sunday telephone calls have turned into a habit of checking our Facebook or Myspace pages. Updates of everyone's lives now come in the form of a thin wire, routed into our homes called the internet. What used to pass for stored phone numbers on the kitchen telephone has turned into passwords on the computer. Web cams have replaced visiting face to face.
While babies first steps have gone digital, there is one thing that can’t be replicated on the internet. Good old fashioned HUGS cannot be replaced by technology. There is nothing to this day that feels better than a hug from a loved one. The closeness you feel to family or friends can’t be hardwired to be shared. There is no software designed to hold you tight and to tell you that you are loved.
There is absolutely no way to mimic the smell of Mom’s home cooking. There is nothing in the world that even comes close to that extra tight hug your Dad gives you, leaving you faintly smelling of his aftershave. You can’t splash your brother or sister in the pool, from 5 states away. You can’t replace the warmth in the living room fireplace, shared by all.
The patriarchs have been chosen. I really believe they were pre-determined to this honored post. I hope they have plans to rebuild. One big gust of wind, and the foundation could be gone. Heck, I’ll even polish the silver…
Wow. Vella Bella. You hit the nail on the head. As I type this I realize I am part of this new age technology, where communication is thru electronic gadgets, English has to be decoded: ie.LMAO, BFF, etc. The reality right now is, I would LOVE to just give you a hug! (I think there are even icons for that now). Physical contact is lost, it's gone with the Pony Express, waitresses on rollerskates and every other outdated thing you can think of. Personal contact, a hug, a smile in person (not webcam) is worth more than all the money in the US Mint. I hate to sound like an old timer, but let's get together sometime, have a glass of wine IN PERSON, and hug! Love u girl.
~C.
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